To the Child I Still Imagine

How bipolar disorder complicated my dream of being a mother

Bryan Barks
7 min readDec 18, 2021

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I want you to know I agonized over your name. For years, I filled my journals with the most beautiful, interesting, unusual girls’ names that came into my mind. Sometimes I would be writing about something entirely unrelated and would stop mid-sentence to scrawl a new name into the margins. Dahlia. Calliope

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Bryan Barks

30. Mental health & gun violence prevention advocate. Baltimore.